If I had a pound for every time someone told me that they’re not photogenic, I wouldn’t need to work anymore. I hear it so frequently. If you want to know how to look good in your wedding photos – it comes down to mindset.
I wish I knew what is it with people (British in particular!) being so down on themselves and thinking they’re not worthy of having a beautiful photo taken of themselves. People thinking that they’ll never look beautiful in wedding photos. Every time I get that “we’re not photogenic” line from an enquiry, I know that they’re totally wrong. And if you’re sitting there thinking that, well, I’m afraid you’re also wrong too.
Let me explain.
You are gorgeous as you are. Seriously. You’re going to look good in your wedding photographs just the way you are.
I know when you look at yourself in the mirror, or in selfies, you see flaws. You see things that other people don’t see. But that’s not what everyone else sees.
Loved Up and Gorgeous
When you get married, you will be the most gorgeous version of yourself. Because it’s your wedding day, you’ll look amazing but you’re also having the most incredible loved-up day of your life. Being in love is what makes you look more gorgeous than any procedures or clinics or potions.
What do I see as a photographer? I see two people in love. I see that look you have between you, the sparkle in your eye. That sparkle outshines everything. I see you and your love, looking at each other. As a photographer, I see you giggling, I see you snuggling, and there’s something special between you.
I remember at a wedding, chatting with one of the bridesmaids at a wedding I’d photographed. She commented on how I had photographed something special between the couple, it was about how they looked at each other. It wasn’t like when you look at a friend or just anyone you’re chatting to – it was a special look that only a couple will have between them. That spark. That reflection in one another’s eyes of how you feel about each other. That’s what you see when you look back at wedding photographs.
Perceived Flaws and Improvements
A few years ago, I stopped buying women’s lifestyle magazines. I realised that a lot of their content was about shaming their readers. Finding, inventing and creating insecurities. Are you thin enough, hot enough, clever enough, earning enough, smart enough, organised enough? Is he the one, how to tell, what if he’s not, how to keep him, how to dump him, are you happy being single, how to find him, how to get him to propose. Are you good enough at your job? How do you dress, look, think, do you have enough friends? Are you a good friend? Do you want to dump a friend? And in between articles boasting of 4-day diets that would make you lose inches immediately, there would are reviews of expensive beauty products claiming to have the font of eternal youth because aging isn’t acceptable.
I felt these magazines didn’t speak to me, or for me. They tried to make their readers feel inadequate, and that only this publication could be the thing to stop you being a social pariah. Clickbait reading out of insecurities. We develop such an ingrained perception that we aren’t good enough and even within the wedding industry I see businesses set up to “improve” people in advance of their wedding day – diets, teeth whitening, even cosmetic surgery. I don’t believe it’s about vanity though. I think we are conditioned to this emotional undermining of who we are and what we deserve, that this projection of inadequacy becomes so infectious to the point that it blinkers your self-worth even on the happiest day of your life.
Sometimes, that feeling can be enough to put people off booking a photographer. They don’t like how they look in photographs so they don’t want to see themselves.
Why You Will Look Good in Wedding Photos
The thing is, you are good enough. You’re beautiful enough, you’re wonderful enough, you’re clever enough, you’re funny enough, you’re handsome enough, you’re pretty enough, you’re witty enough, you’re stylish enough, you’re already everything enough to be loved. You are loved by your family and friends who you invite to your wedding. And you’re loved by the person you’re going to marry – they have found you, they love you and they want to marry you and spend the rest of their lives with you.
When a photographer takes your photograph together, it’s not about physical looks. It’s all about love. Love is photogenic and it makes you look incredible – seriously. It’s the best filter there is. Love is why you’ll look good in your wedding photos. Wedding photography is about the spark. I want to catch that cheeky glint in your eye when you look at each other and try not to giggle for two seconds. It’s wonderful to see the slight dimple in your cheek that only comes out for the people you care about the most. I want to see you finding that moment together, when you feel safe enough to be yourself. It’s the culmination of those things that will help you look good in your wedding photos.
See Yourself As You See Others
When you look back through family photographs of your parents, grandparents, great-grandparents together, what you reflect on isn’t their flaws, it’s their beauty and their character. The way you see others is often the same way others are going to see you. The people you love can look beyond your perceived flaws and see your true beauty. When friends reflect on your photographs, they’re not judging whether you lost enough weight in the run-up to your wedding day, but how happy you are, how in love you are.
But instead of projecting good thoughts about everyone else, it’s time to stop and have kind thoughts about yourself. Because you really are gorgeous and that’s how you will look good in your wedding photographs.
Of course, I offer engagement sessions as well as wedding photography packages. It’s a fantastic way to have a practice run before the big day and I include it with one of my full day packages.
You can find out more about my alternative wedding photography approach. To arrange a chat and find out my availability get in touch. Can’t wait to hear from you!